Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Brilliant Idea!

I was bummed recently with trying to get the house refi'ed so I can get rid of any obligations I have with the ex. Its taken 4 months!. Seems mortgage company didn't like the language used in the paperwork and had lots of questions. Some I could see as they pertained to the settlement, others - a bit prying as they dealt with custody issues (and I can see how this affects my qualifying if I had payments). So back to my depression. . . it was further amplified as I asked the paralegal who dd the paperwork if I was vulnerable and yup - I was. You see, I did not seek half of the ex-wife's retirement account as we both knew I would not be able to qualify for refinancing the entire equity of the house. We both agreed that this was a fair resolution, though not reflected in paperwork. So I forgo the retirement AND I owe her 50% of the equity! Well - Once ex saw the appraisal, I'm sure dollar signs danced in her head (Lipo, boobs, facelift, travel, fly boyfriend out from England again). She had, in fact, inquired if I could actually access her retirement (I could but it would cost too much). So I was a bit nervous. I needed her to sign off on the amount I could qualify for (a difference of about $22K ) fast and I'm thinking she must be talking to others who are coaching her to screw me.

So. . . . While getting rid of gas at work (I won’t elaborate any more) it occurred to me how I should handle any possible “financial issues” with the ex –

If she decides to play ugly and ask for the entire 90K rather than the 60-67K I can afford (and she agreed to), I can counter with one of two things:

“Hey – you have legal first right of refusal on the house” – She can buy me out! (as she can qualify for a higher mortgage) Or -

I’ll just sell it (a hassle), but if she refuses to buy it that’s the only option, If I sell, it’ll only net her possibly 60 on a good day. Besides, if either of these two events happen, she will owe me the mortgage & taxes I’ve paid so far (as it contributed to her equity as well - about an additional 20K)

So I feel much better (both financially and physically) thank you.

Friday, November 12, 2010


I'm pooped. I've worked 3 weeks in a row without a break. Weekends spent in Los Angeles, while tourists are gawking below are annoying.
I really feel used too. I don't mind the occasional crunch, but I have 4 people that feed me work. 2 are in Asia most of the time & their partners so you just have to kind of suck it up. They aren't the bad ones, its the senior associates (or Sr.Asses). They've got something to prove & "by god, their gonna prove it - through me!" I call one AssholeAmy & the other is DoucheDude. AA is anal to the highest degree. Her bunghole is so tight, you can insert charcoal & she'll shit diamonds. She means well, but she is basically an overachiever with no life so she takes on EVERYTHING in the office. Kind of like a high school cheerleader on speed. She makes changes upon changes and if your don't make the changes fast enough, she'll do it herself.
DoucheDude was named by others as he lacks common courtesy of saying thank you. He also has other character flaws like he promises things then forgets, or my favorite - work bombs. He likes to drop little annoying tasks one on top of another. I don't think he's malicious or mean, just careless in how his actions affect others. When he asked how my weekend was, He meant well. When I answered "shitty, spent it here - again". He had the perfect opportunity to say - "Sorry, I appreciate it". But he doesn't.
The fact that I'm paid soooo much less than before, and now my expenses are going up as I got to pay off the one who lied to and cheated on me. They keep telling me that my bonus is structured by how much OT I do. Well toots, I've got 20+ years experience and I know that in this industry, at this time, bonuses are like carrots to horses. I'm not keen on having one dangled in front of me, and a can pretty much tell when their blowing smoke up my ass, and frankly, I can't see 3 feet in front of me. I guess, whats worse is that bonuses are not paid at the holiday season - they pay at fiscal year end, in March. I'll wait to see if in fact there is any kind of renumeration or mentioning of my hard work at Christmas. If I feel their still lying, I'm letting those recruiters know I'm exhausted, er . . . interested.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

My pledge as your friend. . .

1. When you are sad ~ I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.
2. When you are blue ~ I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
3. When you smile ~ I will know you are thinking of something that I would probably want to be involved in.
4. When you are scared ~ I will rag on you about it every chance I get until you're NOT.
5. When you are worried ~ I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.
6. When you are confused ~ I will try to use only little words.
7. When you are sick ~ Stay the fuck away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.
8. When you fall ~ I will laugh at your clumsy ass, but I'll help you up.
9. This is my oath .... I pledge it to the end.

Why- you may ask??
~ because you are my friend.

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Weekend at Bernies - or my Vegas trip with #2

Anyone who’s seen Weekend at Bernie’s, this just about sums up my weekend in Vegas.

Yes – I felt like Bernie

Lets start at the beginning. Hoover Dam. I was last there as a kid. Despite being in Vegas every summer of my childhood, I can’t recall ever going. I can Gar-an-damn-tee you that my parents would not likely invest the .50¢ it probably cost back then to do the tour. As an adult I always wanted to go but my ex thought it dull, besides, it would take precious time away from the tables, free drinks and the gray haze of casino cigarette smoke.

So #2 & his BF helped me realize an item on my bucket list. Sadly. Now, due to my AICD, I can’t go below! SHIT!

So we walked across & it is truly an amazing experience. Very humbling to think of how they built this HUGE dam & the concrete is still curing! Its 600 feet thick at the bottom and just 43 feet thick at the top. Of course #2 & BF were more interested in the 5-man german bike team walking around in lyrca shorts looking like there smuggling plums in their shorts.

So onward to Vegas - but I had a surprise for #2. Because hotels never allow you to check in at a convenient time, I made arrangements for him to do Indoor Skydiving. He had a blast & actually did very well. So off to the hotel we go. Remember that $49.00 rate I got? Well, they tried to charge me $349. for #2's room. After a bit of arguing we settled on $79. for his room and he still got $60. slot credit, and a fantasy room so I thought it fair.

Due to his drinking and short attention span, the only casino games he latched onto was Roulette and both him & BF had fun & did OK. We took in Downtown one afternoon and they were not too impressed. Later we did Dick’s Last Resort for dinner. It was fun & the food was surprising good. They force patron to wear homemade hats with sayings like “I shaved my balls for this?” or “Dr. Phil makes me moist” Not exactly family entertainment, but we had fun!

Some observation –
City Centre is way too big. Very difficult to navigate. Also – I’m really getting sick of porn-slappers. I’m beginning to think they are specifically breeding them – You know, those short Guatemalans that slap the business card before they force it upon you at all the major corners in Vegas. I used to think they were all retired jockeys who didn’t make their weight class then said to hell with it & came to Vegas. Can you imagine what their employment review are like? “I’m sorry Hector, your slapping is not forceful & your not getting into everyone way enough to be effective, turn in your ill-fitting tee-shirt.”

All in all a good time, but I felt a bit out of place most of the time – A bit like Bernie.